Intersecting Paths

Ashvin checked his watch again. It was five minutes past eight on a sunny December morning when his phone silently buzzed in his pocket.
"Hello"
"Dude, I reached the flyover, tell me where to go now." Shouting over the sounds of engines and horns, it was Krishna on the phone.
"Just go over the flyover. Once you get off it, park in the first free spot you find on the left."
"Alright. See you in a bit."
    Ashvin heard the phone go silent and his mind slowly drifted back to the first time he had met Krishna. Their paths were going in diametrically opposite directions and just happened to cross at the research center where Ashvin was working on his undergraduate thesis and Krishna, who had by then obtained a Masters degree in the USA, joined to do his PhD. Though their paths were seemingly at odds, in almost no time they had become good friends. Soon Ashvin left for graduate studies in the USA, but they had managed to kept in touch. It had been a year and a half since Ashvin left and now he was back home for vacations. Back home..
His mind drifted back to the sounds of roaring engines and unforgiving horns. Skirting around the traffic, he slowly made his way to the meeting location- S.L.V. Corner, Ashvin's favourite breakfast place in town.
     By the time Ashvin got across all the traffic, he managed to spot Krishna and waved at him.
As they made their way, Ashvin noticed that Krishna's sense of style or the lack of it hadn't changed since he had left. He wore a bright blue shirt with aeroplanes painted all over it.
Smiling at his shirt, Ashvin said "Nice shirt!"
Obviously not catching the sarcasm, Krishna said "Thank you! It's been a while, how have you been?"
"I'm good man, how about you? How have things been going at The Pit?" Ashvin was the one to come up with the name 'The Pit' for the research center since it was quite small and was constructed over marshy land, metaphorically lending to the already sinking feeling one would get in small research environments.
Krishna, who had taken an instantaneous liking towards the nickname, said "Same old, same old. You know how it is. If I don't get out often, I start to forget that there actually exists a real world outside."
     They entered the fast food place and sat down. "So what's good here? I haven't eaten in a place like this for quite a while."
"My personal favourite is the Kharabath and Vada. You can give the Dosas a shot too" replied Ashvin.
After much deliberation, Krishna decided that he would start with Idlis while Ashvin went with his favourites.
"So.... how has your trip been so far?"
"Good. It's been really nice too meet with all my friends and get away from the snow for a while." After pausing to drink some water, Ashvin continued "So how are things for you? How is your PhD coming along?"
"I have had much better times, but it's fine now. There have been some internal politics and sometimes students are the ones to get affected."
"What politics? I thought The Pit was quite above all that. Considering that each department was so small, why should people have problems?"
"I thought so too, but I guess since its small, all tiny things escalate to ridiculous levels."
Ashvin pondered for a moment, "You know what, that makes sense. Remember Sunny?"
Laughing aloud, "Sunny was one strange guy. He managed to blow tiny fights out of proportions. Ah crap man! It's too tiny for my liking. I barely get along with people these days."
Krishna paused as the food arrived and dove into it without a second thought. After a few greedy bites, he said "By the way, you know that the Chair quit right?"
Ashvin dropped his spoon and said, a little too loudly, "What!? Quit? I thought it was a term based, 2 years or something like that. But you say she quit!"
"Oh you didn't know! Internal politics. Most people have a problem with each other now and the Chair took the nail for no fault of her's"
"But why!?"
As he took another big bite, Krishna said "Ah, long story. I'll tell you the gist. It's a fight between liberty and equality." As Krishna paused to swallow, Ashvin smiled on the inside and thought So he hasn't changed on the 'America has liberty and dream it, do it attitude' either!
"There were some new students joining in last year. While some wanted the students to be distributed equally amongst the researchers, the Chair just wanted to give the choice to the students themselves. Though the rules were on her side, the Chair ended up quitting. Nobody obviously knows the exact details, but I guess that's about what happened."
Ashvin's thoughts drifted back to the Chair, his mentor. She quit... what has the world come to? She was his inspiration and the cruel reality was that politics and ego battles in the scientific community had troubled even the best. Sigh... so that's how it really went down...
Noticing Ashvin's sudden silence, Krishna inquired, "What happened?"
"Nothing.... I think I just felt my bubble burst."
Clearly amused, Krishna said "Bubble? Don't tell me you thought things were going to be all rosy and sweet. Even in the USA, such things happen. Only difference is that the Universities are so big that such incidents get diffused off. In small places they can end up being blown out of proportion."
"No... No I didn't think everything would be smooth sailing. But, I guess I had always hoped that with knowledge comes wisdom."
"With knowledge comes ego... and a lot of it"
A smile crept across Ashvin's face, "That is so true. Maybe I shouldn't make the mistake of treating scientists any different."
"Exactly!" Seeing that his Idlis were over, Krishna slowly spooned out some of Ashvin's Kharabath. He ordered a Dosa this time while Ashvin did a repeat on his initial order.
"So, Ashvin... it's been a year and half now. How do you find it there? Do You like it?"
"Academically, yes. It's been a great learning experience. As for a social life or the lack of one, I guess it is all about finding some balance. As I have told you before, I have managed to make a few geographic or intellectual friends which I guess is the most one can ask for." Ashvin shot a quick smile at Krishna and said "I have managed to travel quite a bit though, so all's good!"
After a moment of thoughtful silence, Krishna said "It's strange how though we are generally quite similar in our views, our experiences have been diametrically opposite. Till date, I refer to Texas as my real home and that I will return back, someday."
Krishna had said that many times before, but Ashvin never had asked why. He had always assumed that Krishna's liking towards USA was mostly because of the freedom he had as compared to The Pit.
"Why? Is it mainly because you find The Pit too annoying?"
"No... Not at all! I chose to come to The Pit because I wanted to work with one of the best. Period. It's more to do with the life I had. I had a life in Texas, I don't any more."
"What about the twenty odd years before that?"
Smiling widely, Krishna said "Sounds strange doesn't it? How could a place become my home just after twenty odd months when I had a home for twenty odd years before that? The thing was, I never had a life before Texas. Those twenty odd years slipped through my fingers while I studied for exams or played video-games"
Ashvin was visibly confused now, "So you feel you didn't have a life because you had to go through the Indian education grind? Or was it because you didn't have many friends and spent a little too much time alone with video games?"
Krishna burst out laughing at that. "Oh God no! Wait, let me explain it. It has more to do with the lack of freedom to dream. To express those dreams and to pursue them."
Krishna paused to order another Dosa while Ashvin decided that he was done for the morning.
As the waiter scurried off to get another Plain Dosa, Krishna continued "I know it sounds a little strange. In all those twenty years, I had no real freedom to be honest; and I consider keeping quiet when someone says something you don't agree with as being dishonest. I was never allowed to express my dreams; more often than not, ambition is mistaken to be arrogance. When I went to Texas, I just instantly felt at home. Honesty and integrity were given a top priority. Dreaming big and pursuing those dreams was encouraged while back home following the crowd was the right way to go about life. I do not talk for all of USA, it's a big place and things vary a lot as you travel across it. But, I really felt like I belonged there; I felt like I had a life."
Ashvin took a few pensive moments before saying anything. "Hmmm.... I guess now that I have actually seen the other side; I can say with experience that I don't completely agree with you. Even in the USA, you cannot always go around telling people what you think or dream. That's a recipe for disaster. I agree that it would be a bigger recipe for disaster here in India than probably in the USA."
"As I said, I speak for Texas and not all of USA."
"Okay.... I don't know about Texas. But, I had a life in India. In fact, I had one in school which I traded for the one I had in college. But now, I am just a stranger in a strange land. I know deep down that I will never belong there, never really feel a part of anything. It's not some random occurrence of racist comments that I refer to. I am talking about the ties that bind us; the ties that make us who we are."
Krishna had gobbled up his Dosa. Noticing that, Ashvin smiled and said "Want another?"
"No, I think I had enough. I'll get a coffee, what about you?"
"No coffee for me." Ashvin asked the waiter for the bill.
As the waiter left, Krishna said "My experience was really good. The first few friends I made there turned out to be my best friends. But here, I am still trying to just get along." Krishna paused for a moment as the waiter put down the coffee. Staring somewhere into the distance he continued "It's really strange how our experiences have been so different. I, a master's student from USA who loved the life back there, left it to come here and do a PhD. You, who had a life here, left it to pursue grad. studies in the USA."
Nodding, Ashvin said, "You are right, we have had very different experiences. You experienced the freedom that USA gave you and felt you could achieve a hell lot with it. I agree with you; there definitely is a lot more freedom there to express your views and pursue your dreams without people judging you. I feel I have lost a lot by leaving this country. Maybe a lot of people don't feel that way or never realise it. At the end of it all, things balance out don't they?"
A curious smile spread on Krishna's face, "Don't we all love to believe that they do?"
   The waiter returned with the bill. As Ashvin opened up his wallet, Krishna said "It's my turn this time. You paid the last time we ate out."
"Man! You are trying to get off cheap aren't you?"
Chuckling, Krishna said "I am a grad. student in India. I am allowed to do so."
  As they left, Ashvin said "You know what, it was really nice to meet you. I don't think either of us have changed one bit."
"I don't quite agree on that. I think you have changed."
Surprised, Ashvin said, "Oh really? How so?"
"You said 'it was nice to meet you'. The american small talk which you so fondly think as superficial has caught onto you."
Ashvin laughed and bid goodbye.
As they parted, they drifted away into the noisy world outside in opposite directions.

Strangers In An Airport

"Sir... What is your final destination?", the woman asked again in a polite dispassionate tone.

When he finally managed to snap out of his reverie, he said "Bangalore, India".

"Do you have a transit visa?"

The woman was dressed in a blue suit and wore a matching scarf around her neck. Her blue eyes accentuated her sharp features which were drawn together into a confused frown.

"Sir... Sir... Mr. umm.. Moothe do you have a transit visa?", she was now visibly annoyed.

"No... No I don't. I'm sorry, I just..." Though by now he had grown used to people mispronouncing his name as Ash-win Moothe instead of Ashvin Murthy, he was still annoyed that his surname now meant mouth in Kannada. He started to explain why he seemed to be lost in a day dream when she cut him short.

"Your boarding pass says that you need one."

"I thought I don't need one since I am heading to India," he explained.

"Let me have a look..." She started keying in something on her keyboard. After a minute or so her expression resumed its original dispassionate form which closely matched her voice.

"Okay.. it looks like you do not need a transit visa. I am printing out your new boarding passes."

She handed him his boarding passes and flashed a practiced smile as she said "You're good to go."

"Thank you"

Glad to have just a small carry-on bag with him, he set off to the next ordeal: security check. The prospect of having to remove his belt and hold his trousers in place from falling to the ground did little to brighten him.

Maybe I should either buy clothes of the right size or grow fatter to avoid holding up my trousers like an idiot... sigh!

He eyed the boarding passes once again just to make sure that it was in order. He let out an inaudible groan when he saw the long line of people stripping off their jackets, shoes, belts and any object made out of metal and slowly trudging through the detectors.

Well, it's for our own security. A little embarrassment shouldn't hurt.

It took him nearly 30 minutes to get to the other side of the detectors. He slowly trudged along and made his way towards gate B24. As always he glanced through all the shops as he walked past them.

Hmm.. two coffee shops, one of them looked like an expensive cafe; three liquor stores parading as chocolate shops on the outside, two apparel stores selling t-shirts with quirky captions, a high-end expensive hand bag shop and a bar which looked like it had been lifted out of a tropical island.

He always wondered who in their right mind would ever buy a Mont Blanc watch in an airport. The entire showroom must be just an expensive advertisement. I guess being a sales representative here is probably the easiest and the most boring job in an airport.

When he finally reached the gate, he checked the LED display to ensure that he still had a couple of hours before boarding the flight. After he felt that the display had nothing more interesting to offer he scanned the chairs to find an empty one in the corner by the window. He slowly made his way, skirting around a baby trolley and the out-stretched legs of a man in a grey hoodie who seemed to be peacefully asleep, and settled down by the window. It was nearly a half past nine on a rather gloomy winter morning. The sun was trying hard to peek through the narrow gaps between the clouds every now and then. His eyes settled down on a small truck that was trying to unload something from an aircraft. Something he saw in the truck prompted him to remember the woman in blue.

What was her name.... hmm... Kelly I think. He smiled as he thought; She must have been quite annoyed with me just lost in my own world while she was trying to fix my transit visa issues.

He closed his eyes and soon his thoughts drifted to what his mind was originally preoccupied with. A girl.

When he opened his eyes, to his surprise he saw shafts of sunlight illuminating the nascent snowfall outside. It had not been cold enough that morning and yet it was snowing. It looked so surreal that he let out an almost inaudible "Woah!"

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

Ashvin was surprised to find the man in the grey hoodie standing next to him transfixed at the sight outside.

The man shot a quick glance at him and said, "It didn't look like it would snow today." Noticing his startled expression, the man quickly added "My name is Aditya."

"My name is Ashvin."

On closer observation, Ashvin noticed that the man who had introduced himself as Aditya was clean shaved, gaunt, had a thick furry brow and a thin receding hairline. If he grew a thick mustache, he would have had a striking resemblance with a popular Kannada movie actor whose name seemed to just elude him at the moment. He almost unconsciously smiled imagining the mustache.

"Where are you heading?"

Aditya let out an audible sigh as he said "Home... India", especially emphasizing on the word Home in a slightly South-Indian accent. Once again the mustached Kannada movie actor popped up in Ashvin's mind.

Controlling his urge to smile again, he said "Sounds like you aren't too keen on going back."

"That's not the case, I am usually happy going home..." again emphasizing on the word usually, almost making it obvious that he wanted Ashvin to ask why. 

Deciding to play along, Ashvin said "Usually...?"

Like an overly enthusiastic actor eager to say his dialogue in a play, Aditya at once said "Ah! Well... this time when I go home, I am supposed to select a girl for marriage."

He looks like he is in his mid-twenties too. For a few moments Ashvin remained silent, again drifting away. He finally said "Marriage... do you have a problem with arranged marriage?"

Aditya scowled as he said, "It's not that I have a problem with arranged marriage. No, let me rephrase that. It's not just the arranged part that I have a problem with."

Ashvin noted that for a very normal, unremarkable guy; Aditya's obvious distaste for marriage was not ordinary. His frown said a lot more than his otherwise calm voice.

Ashvin politely inquired, "And why is it such a problem for you?"

"I have been given five 'options' by my parents; the set of girls they shortlisted based on their own criteria. Now I have to answer the biggest MCQ of my life by picking one out of the five options based on a few cups of filter coffee and a few awkward conversations. Couldn't they just make it a little fairer for me and throw in a 'none of the above' option!?" He suddenly burst out laughing aloud at his own joke.

Aware of the eyes watching them, Ashvin quickly glanced at his watch. Still another hour to go before boarding the flight. Coffee would be a good excuse to get away from here for a while. "Would you like to get some coffee?"

"Sure." Checking his watch, Aditya said "We still have an hour for boarding I guess."

As they slowly made their way to the cheaper of the two coffee shops, Ashvin noticed that the stranger for the day had a cheerful vibe about him expect for his obvious issues with marriage. In comparison, his own thoughts had left him feeling a little dull. They reached the coffee shop, where a bright young girl wearing a green cap offered to take their orders. Her lapel read Cindi. Ashvin started to wonder; Are all girls with names ending with an 'i' so enthusiastic? Consciously deciding to continue that line of thought later, he asked for an Expresso; while Aditya was squinting hard, almost in a childish manner, at the Menu unable to decide. He finally decided on a hot chocolate with extra cream and sugar. Cindi had a short pony-tail which bounced about as she scurried away to fetch the orders.

They sat down on a table nearby. A few thoughtful moments were observed in silence while savoring the hot beverage. It was Aditya who broke the comfortable lull.

"So what takes you home, this time of the year?"

It was quite a harmless and simple question. There seemed to be many, many ways in which Ashvin could answer it, but none seemed right. Even if they were right, at the very least they would have ended up making the mood quite grim. So carefully dodging the topic, he vaguely said "You know... sometimes you think you did extremely well in an exam. You end up bragging about it to everyone and finally when the results come out, you come to know that things ended up going horribly wrong. You wish that everyone could just forget what you had told them but to your misfortune every single person seems to remember and make it a point to ask you about the results. No matter how many very 'genuine' excuses you might come up with to hide your shame, all you can picture is their disapproval." He just smiled wanly as he once again drifted into his earlier thoughts.

Aditya, who by now had forgotten his question, gulped his hot chocolate and started laughing wildly. "Yeah man! I have so been there..." The rest of the conversation was lost upon Ashvin who was now completely immersed in his own hopes and fears until; "Check out that babe! Your 3 o'clock, quick!"

"Okay!" Slightly surprised by the sudden change in direction he thought: This is probably just another 'despo' who doesn't like a serious commitment, hence the aversion for marriage. 

"Oh man! Doesn't she look incredible in that dress!?" Aditya exclaimed quite comically and suddenly seemed to remember something disturbing as he said "Argh...! I am going to loose my freedom soon. I love this independent, unfettered, single life where I live the way I want to, do what I want to and go where I want to not worrying about mundane responsibilities. In one go, all my happiness is probably going to be sucked away and what will be left behind would be another typical 'settled' Indian. Don't you think so?"

"Hmm, don't you want to settle down?"

Aditya took a moment before answering "Well I don't mind settling down sometime in the future, but I want to enjoy this freedom I have now. Why should I give up on that just because my parents think that I need to get married before a certain age? "

"You want the cake, cream, cherry and eat it too."

"Ah, that may be so. But, do you truly see meaning in living a life you dislike just so that you conform to the rest of the world?"

Ashvin again drifted back into his thoughts while Aditya surveyed the people around him. Suddenly the airport seemed to be bustling with renewed activity. Satisfied that there was nothing interesting happening, his attention reverted first to his hot chocolate and then to his troubled companion. This guy surely has some problem, but isn't willing to speak to a stranger about it.

Ashvin finally broke his pensive silence and said at length, "You cannot forever shirk away responsibilities. Besides, I don't think you have completely looked into the positive side of marriage. I have been in love for a long time now and I want to share the rest of my life with her. There is so much joy in sharing. You just have to experience it; you would surely understand why it is such a rich experience that compared to it, the freedom in being single and life without responsibilities doesn't really matter."

Taking a long sip, Aditya said "So I take it that you are going to marry this person very soon."

A deep frown etched Ashvin's face now. Damn! With a slow and deliberate voice, he said "I was afraid this conversation was going to go gloomy sooner or later. I don't know why I am even talking to you about all this."

"For a person who likes the concept of marriage, I thought you would have liked to change my opinion with some 'new' convincing argument." For just a fraction of a second a sarcastic smile appeared on Aditya's face. "I'm sorry, let's leave it if it troubles you so much."

Ashvin did not seem to notice the sarcasm, "I am clear about what I want in my life, but I can't say the same about her. We have been in a relationship for a few years. Now when I suggest that we marry, she seems to have become enlightened about all the practical problems that would ensue. Suddenly, it's not worth all the trouble she would have to go through to be with me. I have seen people talk about love lightly, but I didn't imagine that I would be at the receiving end."

"Hmm... that sounds bad. Wouldn't such a situation make one loose their faith in things like love and marriage?"

"No! I believe I met the wrong person and it took me too long to realize that. I still think that marriage is a necessary and rich experience everyone must go through."

Aditya took a moment observing the person across the table. "Don't you think that if you had not met this person, you would not have been in this situation?

Ashvin took a sip and seemed to stare into the distance as he said "Thinking like that would undermine all the happy times."

"Maybe... Maybe not. Is the rise worth the fall?"

"Let me ask you something Aditya, do you like living alone?"

"No way man! Who does?"

Ashvin was visibly relieved by that reply; nodding as he said, "So you do accept that you don't want to end up alone. So it seems that you accept that you do need company of some form. Eventually marriage is the one thing that will save you from a lonely life."

"I agree with you completely on that. But, it would be true only if you find the right person to share it with. So it is just a statistical probability that I will find happiness with the girl my parents suggest."

That seemed to amuse Ashvin. He said, "That's quite a scientific way of looking at it. Look at my own experience; many times you might think you know a person very a well until things go wrong. If I think back and see, I believe we spent more time talking about some common interests but never really talked about what we expected from each other." Suddenly a pang of sadness flashed across his face as he trailed off, "I wish..."

For a few moments silence ensued, it was Aditya who finally said "I guess I must confess that you are right about many things. I agree that I don't want to live alone; it is true that be it a person you love or someone your parents choose, when the time really comes, things usually never work out as you imagine they would. But, nobody ever addresses the issue of why should one conform? Why should settling down be at the expense of a lot of freedom?"

"Why not think of it as a different sort of an adventure? It is a novel experience that you can never experience unmarried."

A smile spread across Aditya's face as he said, "I like that view. I have never really bothered myself too much with the details of most things in life. I have always taken things as they come. You may have a point there. But, by your very own argument, you should not be so troubled by one single person."

The last comment seemed to annoy Ashvin, "When you know that someone is the one for you, how can you not be troubled?"

"The one? What do you even mean by that? If a person doesn't want to fight to be with you, how can she be the one?"

Ashvin now was clearly angry, "How can you conclude that without even knowing the person? You don't..."

Aditya cut him off, "Hey! Chill out man! I don't mean to offend you. You seem like a person who thinks things through very well. Unlike me, you are a man with a plan. But, how can you let one person dictate your life and hold you back from enjoying it?"

Ashvin was dumbstruck by that. He tried to take a sip from his cup only to realize that it was already empty. When Aditya saw that and started laughing, he managed a sheepish grin. This guy actually makes sense. I had written him off to be just scared of commitment, but that may not be the case. After a few moments, he finally said "You are right. Though I hate to admit it.... you are right. Maybe I let a single person dictate my life for too long."

With a big grin, Aditya said "Now we are talking!" In a more sober tone he said, "I must confess that as you have rightly pointed out, I have been biased about marriage. Maybe it is going to be quite an interesting adventure, maybe losing some of the freedom and accepting some responsibilities instead isn't as bad as I made it out to be. Who knows, I might even end up with a girl as crazy as me." With a big grin he added, "Hey! Lot many more fish in the sea. I'm sure you can find another one without any difficulty."

With a mischievous smile, Ashvin said "Like the hottie at your 7 o'clock?"

Like a bullet, Aditya whipped his head around to find an old woman, probably in her sixties, asleep with her mouth wide open and an open book on her lap. He burst out laughing, "And here I was thinking that you just didn't have a sense of humour!"

Ashvin joined his wild laughter, again drawing the attention of a few people nearby. One of them seemed to have been busy with her thoughts now looked very startled. He saw his watch and realized that it was about time for boarding the flight. Aditya seemed to notice too. Wordlessly they got up and started walking towards the gate.

Much to his own surprise, Ashvin blurted "It was nice to meet you Aditya and thanks a lot."

"It was nice to meet you too, but what is the thanks for?" A curious smile spread across his face.

"For pointing out the babe at my 3 o'clock, I think she was checking me out."

"For a moment I thought you were thanking me for changing your perspective on marriage" jibed Aditya.

"Yeah, you wish..." At that both of them burst out laughing.

As the humdrum of the airport muffled out their voices; "So, Ashvin, you never told me what is it that you do for a living besides convincing people about the positive side of marriage....."

Cindi came out of the shop to clear the table wondering why the only customers that morning were laughing vividly. Finding no answers in the empty cups, she threw them in to recycle. It was time for a break from what had been a slow, long morning. Her ponytail bouncing about as she scurried off to grab a bite to eat.

Thank you Vidyasagar, for helping me with the story.

Muse

     As the hours ticked away, he continued to sit alone in his chair. It was yet another cold day outside but within his basement, he sat with a big smile on his face. His thoughts jumped between the present and the past every now and then. The tiny earphones lodged within his earlobes innocently continued to play music which somehow magically seemed to rhyme with his thoughts. 

     The hours ticked away, but he took no notice of time. Within his own world, time had stopped still. In his world, time was a conspiracy theory that had been propounded to keep people from experiencing freedom. But, none of that affected him now. In his own world he was happy, so happy that it seemed like the very purpose of his existence seemed to have been satiated.

     As the hours ticked away, his eyes wandered aimlessly. Unfocused they danced around every corner of space that lay ahead of him. They momentarily rested upon the very thing that had put him in such a state of mind. His muse. Within his world, as the seasons drifted by, the poet within him painted the skies with ballads of falling leaves, grey clouds and drops of floating rain.

     The hours ticked away, but he sunk deeper into pensive waters. There was a lot he wished to tell and lot more he wished to ask. His muse lifted him high over the azure skies, dove low through silent trenches and lifted him high only to dive back again. Like many of the interesting things in the world, his muse made his life complicated yet simple. Each day a lesson in patience.

     As the hours ticked away, he continued to smile. His head lacked logical reasons, but his heart didn't care to search for one. Unfettered by his muse, this ephemeral moment would remain etched deep in his memory. As for the mysteries of tomorrow, his only wish is to be pleasantly surprised by them. As for today, his wish is to understand the enigma he beheld. His muse.

ARK 2: Fallout

I knew the coordinates of the safe house where Diedric would be in the event of CRAA, but the tough part was making my way through the ever changing NML terrain. Though this part of the world was mostly untouched by war, it was the common hiding grounds for people from both sides, which meant that it was the fertile grounds for clandestine warfare. It would inevitably be full of monitored and unmonitored traps, mines and even small scale tactical nuclear devices. I made my way carefully, all the while deactivating triggers.

After an arduous eight hours, I reached the face of a steeply rising hill. I moved a few meters along the edge and reached a small alcove well hidden by trees. I squeezed myself in, with hardly enough room for my lungs to expand. After a few feet the recess gave way to a large chamber. To my surprise the chamber was very bright and humid. A lanky, balding man wearing eye gear that had a uni-ocular opening waved his hand at me without lifting his gaze from what looked like a trey with an array of very small tubes.
He said “What took you so long?” in his usual raspy voice all the while meddling with his trey.
“How long has it really been? You see the last thing I can seem to remember is me lying on an autopsy table close to death than ever!” I replied.
For the first time he lifted his head, removed the eye gear and walked towards me and said “I am actually worried.” He did look worried; I was surprised, ‘What had really happened? Even Diedric is troubled!’
“Diedric, please help me out here. I’ve been a fugue state. It had been auto activated. What was our last communication?”
Diedric’s face went pale white. “So it’s true, we have a serious situation!” he said. “I suppose you don’t remember anything. I am sure you will remember things in time, but time is something we don’t have. We were following up a lead on a possible mole in our government. The circumstances which led to World War III and the Cold War that ensued are questionable. You were trying to dig out dirt with respect to our own leaders during WWIII. All this started over a week ago. You have been MIA for five days. You know in our language what it means.”
I knew what it meant; it meant I was soon to be considered dead! We were allowed to cut ourselves from the HQ for a maximum of a week after which we were considered to be dead and would be assassinated if found alive. Clandestine warfare of the new eon! “OK, that gives me half the picture, have you prepared any dossier?” I asked.
“Yes I have, it’s on the shelf to your left. I’ve spiced up the science details just the way you like it!”
I smiled to myself; Diedric hadn’t given up on his retirement plan oh becoming a sci-fi author. I picked up a printout which was titled ‘Fallout’ and started to go through it.

Scientists have established that we know only a small part of the universe. It is this part that is actually ‘visible’ to us. Our universe consists of several ‘Big Bangs’ occurring throughout the universe. The lifetime of the galaxies thus formed is very large; therefore we have been until now unable to witness any such event. But, with the advent of technology and the ‘Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence’, once more popularly known as SETI, we were able to pick up a signal from a very distant galaxy in the Abell 2218 cluster. The signal was picked up for a few days, only during the start of a new Eon of Aquarius (precision of the equinox, 2150 A.D.). Scientists were then able to confirm that during earlier eons the signal was mistaken for signs of God.

The result of the ‘alien message’, as it was popularly publicized, was that major political reformations were passed regarding to the allocation of resources for scientific activities. Since most countries didn’t have the required economy to support such activity, the world soon merged into two major groups known as The Central Federation and The Union Republic. As the science race intensified so did the political agenda of megalomaniacs. To prevent any possibilities of war, both sides agreed to conduct the scientific research together. This whole process in itself took two centuries. By then people began to doubt the message itself. Finally in 2355 A.D., a scientific breakthrough led to the deciphering of the ‘alien message’. Scientists believed that it gave directions to what was popularly known as ‘worm holes’ closest to our galaxy. The common belief was that at the other end lay abundant resources and possibly alien life. Though the two confederations together sent a probe in search of the worm hole (2403 A.D.), the possibility of greater power forced both the groups to start assimilating enormous nuclear destructive power. The mission was successful. The probe was able to travel through the ‘worm hole’ and returned. Scientists were able to confirm that the probe had definitely picked up information of an alien life form. But, due to some technical problems, the probe was forced to execute an emergency landing in Andromeda (2499 A.D.). The political turmoil on Earth had by then reached its climax, both the groups started to argue about the retrieval of the probe. This is when history becomes murky. Someone launched a nuclear strike. Each confederation blames the other. This resulted in the World War III. As expected the war lasted exactly 79 minutes. By the 80th minute the world progress was rewound by about half a millennium. The battle was fought through computer launch sequences. Everything both the confederations had worked for was completely obliterated.

The world then entered a phase of Cold War and has been that way until now, 2525 A.D. The confederations are trying to build their scientific base from scratch so as to launch a retriever for the probe. The mutual agreement was shattered and thus the world was again in open competition. Besides science most of the remaining resources was allocated to intelligence and counter intelligence. The Warm War has been a phase of political mayhem. The current leaders Pyxis of The Central Federation and Pashun of The Union Republic are trying to put an end to the Warm War. In an effort to save the world, a small group of clandestine operatives have come together and trying to find out all major sources of disturbance. The result of this was that we found many questionable events during WWIII and the fallout.

I felt all of it sounded familiar, a vague picture seemed to form in my mind. “So I guess I must start retracing my steps.”
“Yes. Your last debrief was from the capital itself,” he said.
Something that had been bothering me for a while surfaced, “why wasn’t I killed?” Suddenly I realized what danger I had brought onto Diedric. I cautiously said, “You don’t cook well; you should probably eat the insta-food.” This was a code to alert each other in case of danger. Diedric didn’t miss a beat; he hit a few levers and started to clear out his table.
“Right draw, 4478,” he said hurriedly.
I opened the draw and found a small document titled Gordaine. ‘Argh! That wretched code name!’
He slipped into his camouflage suit. Our suits linked up and relayed information. He smiled at me and said, “finally a code name change! This one seems quite nice.”
Diedric would have to find another safe place for himself. He was most safe on his own. Now my journey had begun, but unlike usual journeys this one started from the end and I had to retrace my path.

ARK 1: Fugue

Though the light was dim, I felt like staring into search lights. The effect of the drug was slowly fading and the pain, seeping back in. I knew that it had been a miracle that I was alive. I knew this not because I remembered what had happened to me, but by the seriousness of my wounds. My head hurt every time I tried to remember anything, so for the moment I decided to rest. I was suddenly hit by a wave of convulsions. I desperately tried to grab the sides of what seemed like an autopsy table. ‘Hell!’ ‘Am I dead?’ The convulsions made way to pain and nausea. ‘I am alive, or at least I should assume so for the moment because everything I did from then would be vital for survival.’
I carefully injected myself with another dose of the drug. Relief! I could fight the pain now. Slowly and carefully, I sat up and started to tend to my wounds with whatever first aid I could find. Now that the pain was gone, I began to wonder what I was doing in this dingy room. Before my thoughts could become coherent, I heard footsteps and reflexively got off the table and moved to the nearest dark corner and crouched. ‘Why did I do that?’ A senile man clad in scrubs entered. He froze at the sight of the empty table, looked startled and confused. I waited in the shadows, in silence.
“Anybody here? I am only here to help” said a weak voice.
After some consideration, I replied “Who are you? How did I get here?” I was startled at the seriousness of my own voice.
“I am Rivera, a mortician. I found you in my graveyard.”
In between bursts of pain, I muttered “I’ve heard of backyards, but ‘your’ graveyard? Anyway, where am I? How did I get these wounds?”
“Son, can you tell me your name? I just found you lying covered in blood in the graveyard; I don’t know how you got here. This is a place is separated from the village by the woods.”
“Village! I must be in NML!” I felt a sudden twitch in my head and suddenly it all seemed to come back. “Ah! I remember why I came here. I needed to collects a few plants to prepare some extracts. I am a doctor in a nearby village. I was attacked by the beasts. My name is Sylvan”
“Ah! They have become quite the menace. Frankly, I am amazed at how resilient you are. I have not seen such terrible wounds heal so fast. Are you really from another village in NML? ”
My mind was clearing up now, I examined my body to find a deep cut on the side which seemed to have just missed slicing open my kidneys and a long gash on the left thigh. ‘That will leave an ugly scar!’
“Anyway,” the weak voice continued “you should probably go to the village and get those wounds treated as soon as you can.”
“Yeah I guess so. Can you please get me my clothing and my bag? I think I should be able to manage on my own now. Thank you very much for your assistance Rivera.”

Despite his protests I left the lone house and headed into the woods. Something twitched in my head again, this time I could discern a faint click. A huge wave of pain and nausea hit me. My knees buckled and I fell headlong onto the dusty road. My brain seemed to swim around as I coughed out blood. ‘I’d be damned! I had entered a fugue state!? The auto-alarm had been activated. Well I guess there is a first time to everything.’ I reached into my bag and placed my fingers on the scanners which were extremely well hidden. The insides of what looked like a dusty, ordinary duffel bag whirred into life. A briefcase made of super-flexible polymers clicked open. I picked up my camouflage wear, checked if the suit was completely charged up and switched into it quickly. The dark overall covering the suit adjusted itself to fit me perfectly. I adjusted the suit temperature settings and activated the first aid. My head felt light as the morphine hit the blood stream along with a swarm of nanobots. ‘I must remember to thank Diedric when I meet him next time, if there were ever to be a next time.’ The nanobots started to heal the wounds from the inside. The broken cells were smoothly replicated using the raw materials that they contained within themselves.

I sat down, leaning onto the trunk of an old tree. ‘How am I in such a mess?’ I thought bitterly. ‘I have never been forced into a fugue state.’ Thank God! Diedric had insisted on having an auto alarm system that would let my brain enter a state of amnesia where a new identity would be supplied. That way, if I were ever captured, I would be of no use to my captors. He had created the proxy Sylvan, a doctor hailing from one of the many tiny villages in No Man’s Land or NML and encoded the primary objective as seeking a hideout in the woods of NML. Once I reached my destination I would automatically emerge from the fugue state. Diedric had mused about the significance of choosing the name Sylvan since it meant a spirit that frequents the woods. I smiled despite my pain. The whole system was such that, upon reaching the woods, I was only supposed to feel tired and remember nothing about the journey itself. But something had gone wrong. Something had gone terribly wrong. I reached into the bag and picked up a piece of laminated paper, of the size of my palm. After scanning my fingerprints and retina, the computer asked for my Code Name. I replied “Gordaine” gritting my teeth remembering that I was always denied permission to change my Code Name. The computer came to life showing an array of tools and automatically established a connection to the headquarters. My worst suspicions came true when I saw the computer initiate the self-destruct sequence. Diedric had come up with this addition recently. The computer housed nanobots, which could destroy the computer incase the security of the headquarters was severely compromised. This meant there was a Code Red Alpha Alert (CRAA). During a CRAA all the agents had a complete identity make-over. Ironically I finally got a Code Name change. All the information regarding the new identity was stored in the suit which had been automatically activated by the computer before it disintegrated into dust. I heard a faint click in my head, followed by a wave information being sent directly into the permanent memory at dizzying speeds. After a few minutes of disorientation my thoughts became coherent. ‘Ark! Ark Heys…. sounds good’ I thought to myself.

I got up and slowly started walking deeper into the woods. I couldn’t help but wonder what it was exactly that had led to me turning up half dead in some graveyard and the HQ into a CRAA. I activated the computer on my sleeve and started to scroll through what it had recorded of the past few days. I stopped dead. I had been in a fugue state for more than a week! How did they get to me when I was in deep cover! Just the thought sent shivers down my spine. It was happening. However much I would have loved to deny my premonitions, it was inevitable. Unconsciously, I started to walk faster; I had to get to Diedric quickly. If he was still alive, I knew where to find him. I had to do my part to save the planet before it was too late. I had to stop the imminent war!

Love That Hurt... Part 2

He is late yet again. It has been a week since the last doctor visit. Her condition has been getting progressively worse. I don’t know what the lab test results say. I hope everything is ok. We should be leaving else we will miss the appointment.
On reaching the hospital we make our way to the examination room.
“Yes, what seems to be the problem” asks the doctor looking through his spectacles, silently judging me.
Disregarding his piercing gaze I reply, “The symptoms have become worse. She now has nightmares during the day. She wakes up screaming during her afternoon naps. She somehow doesn’t seem to have that problem in the night. Her fever is back, and the medicine you gave just isn’t working.”
“Is that all? Or have anymore symptoms presented themselves?”
“Yes, there is one other thing. Her left hand pinky keeps twitching every now and then. Doctor, I am really worried, please, I beg you …..”
“I will certainly look into it. The new symptoms make this a very serious case. The lab test results are completely normal which makes this case all the more dangerous. It could be an unknown infection. We better admit you daughter immediately and keep her under observation. I would very much like it if you could provide all her previous medical records”
I nearly let out sign of relief but satisfy myself with a smile. Ammu is finally going to be admitted and treated well. Thank God! Her efforts are not in vain.
Vicky hands over her file to the doctor who on examining it exclaims, “Good God! I am your tenth doctor in six months.”
Vicky says, “My wife sometimes worries too much about Ammu. She says none of the doctors take a good look at Ammu, everyone is always sure that there is nothing wrong with her. So she practically has searched out all the doctors in this city.”
“That I must agree.” Says Narayan who then turns to me and says, “You know your daughter is actually fine. I was going to admit her for your satisfaction.”
I was both shocked and enraged. I say, “What the hell do you mean? My satisfaction!? Ammu is sick. She is so sick, she has nightmares. She is in pain, just look at her. Can’t you tell that she is in pain? How can all of you people be so insensitive?”
“I don’t mean to offend you, but surely you must understand that no doctor can treat the deadliest disease that never existed! After last weeks visit, I did a little probing myself and found quite a few interesting things.” He then turns to Vicky and asks, “Is she normal otherwise? As in, with regard to matters that do not involve Ammu and her health is she rational?”
Vicky at first looks surprised by the doctor’s behavior but calmly replies, “No, she is otherwise fine.”
Narayan lets out a small snigger of victory and turn to me and says, “I’ll tell you a small story. Baron von Munchausen a German who served in the military until 1750. After returning home he supposedly told a number of outrageous tall tales about his adventures. According to the stories, as retold by others, the Baron's astounding feats included riding cannonballs, traveling to the Moon, and escaping from a swamp by pulling himself up by his own hair. Well, the moral of the story is that a disorder has been named after the Baron, called……”
I can’t take anymore of this, so I yell, “This is bullshit. What has this got to do with anything at all? Are you even a doctor?”
Narayan coolly says, “I am perfectly sane, are you? Tell me, what are you feeding Ammu? Why are you poisoning her yourself and then saying she is ill? Is it the attention? Do you feel that your daughter needs sympathy from everyone?”
Vicky looks at me confused and in a quivering voice asks, “Please explain your self Dr. Narayan, this is not something to joke about.”
“This is not a joke, there is only one patient here, and that is your wife. She is suffering from Munchausen syndrome by proxy. It is a dangerous disorder wherein injury is deliberately and gradually inflicted upon someone to gain attention or for some other benefit.”
Vicky still quivering, “Even if what you are saying is true, you imply that my wife poisoned Ammu just to get her treated again!? That’s more messed up than most serial killer movies I have seen!”
Narayan says, “Believe me or not, but eventually you will have to face the facts. Why the symptoms almost never appear when you are around. Even if they do, it’s mostly one or at most two of large list of symptoms your wife provided me with and in lesser intensity. If you would have monitored the usage of my prescribed medicine you might have noticed the over use, which would explain why the lab reports show toxins and over use of the medicines. Your wife is sick, its best you save your daughter before she eventually kills her!”

What do these people think I am? Some kind of monster? They don’t understand how I feel. Ammu is my precious daughter. She is special. Such special kids must be looked after very well, not by me in this germ filled home. But those doctors would not take her in. I had to get her to a safe place until she would be strong enough to take on these infections, bacteria, fungi, virus, etc. Our world is not safe for Ammu. How would these imbeciles understand this?
How can a mother’s love hurt?

Love That Hurt… Part 1

He is late again. I wish he didn’t do that, not when there was so much going on. Now that granny had passed away, for the last eight months I have had to take care of Ammu all by myself. I wish he would be more supportive, at least now when the symptoms were repeating themselves. Ammu was coughing out so loud that I thought, God forbid, her intestines would burst out. There was some blood as well, on the inner lining of her mouth. Well, when a two year old is so sick, you put her in ICU and make sure she is safe. But no! When granny was here she would always shoo off the symptoms as very minor issues and sometimes even say that I was exaggerating. I was exaggerating! Could I be cared for any lesser? I wish that now that granny was not around, not that I had hoped for her death, it would be much easier to get my word through to him and those doctors. Those damn doctors who wouldn’t care to take a second glance at Ammu. Those self-assured, heartless, bas…. God! Even I have been forced to stoop down to this level. Anyway, I hope at least today my voice is accounted for. After all, the blood, the coughing fit and her twitching fingers ought to convince him and those doctors how sick Ammu is. I think he is back, I hope he hasn’t forgotten to pick up the cooking supplies I ordered through the phone this morning.

“Hey, how was your day? Oh look what we have here Ammu. Do you like your new toy?” says Vicky who is overly cheerful.
“Terrible”, doesn’t he realize how pale Ammu is. I yell, “Vicky, are you even a human being?”
“What? What’s gotten into you?”
“Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed how sick Ammu is! She coughed so much that she bled out of her mouth. She was running high temperature and she looks so pale! You don’t need to look so surprised. Just help me take her to the hospital; we have an appointment with the doctor at seven.”
“Ok. Let’s leave immediately” says Vicky.

We didn’t talk on the way. I was worried sick of Ammu. It looked like she wanted to tell how much pain she was in, but just couldn’t because the pain silenced her into suffocated sobs. Just looking made me depressed. Why the hell wouldn’t the damn doctor take a proper look at her? If only she had been properly diagnosed six months back, all this trouble would have been prevented.

“We are here for the 7 o’clock appointment with Dr. Narayan.”
The receptionist monotonously replies “You may take this corridor. It’s the second last door to the left.”

“Yes. What seems to be the problem?” enquires a very obese bespectacled doctor who must be Dr. Narayan.
I reply, “Ammu has had a severe coughing fit today. I noticed blood on the inner lining of her mouth. She has had high fever in the morning.”
“Has she exhibited these symptoms before?”
“Yes, in fact she has had on and off episodes for the last month.”
“Then why wasn’t this brought to my notice earlier? Anyway, let me examine her. She seems to have normal temperature now. Her breathing is quite stable. Has she coughed in the last hour or so?”
Vicky interjects, “No doctor, I don’t believe so.”
I plea, “But doctor, this is perhaps the third time this week. I have also observed difficulty in her breathing, like asthma.”
Vicky whispers to me “You didn’t tell me that!”
Yeah right! When will he learn to see what is obviously in front of him. God save this family. I wish that Ammu gets through all of this.
After a few minutes the Doctor announces, “Ammu might be showing rudimentary signs of asthma, I will prescribe medicines for the breathing problem. As for the fever, since she has no sign of it now, in case the temperature crosses 100 degrees give her this tablet dissolved in water and a sponge bath.”
We didn’t talk much on the way back. I only wished that Ammu was taken in by the hospital. It was perhaps the best thing for her at the moment, but the doctor yet again had sent her back; at least this time with some prescriptions.

Memoir Of A Memory: Chapter 1 - Cube

The weather was really bad. Night was not the problem; in fact it was of great help, but the rain could become troublesome. He knew that this was not going to be easy, especially with the downpour.
It was a little after 10. He had less than two hours to get the job done because at 12 was the end of the day he thought. “End of the day” he mused; yet he knew it was no joke. Nobody could laugh at time and get away with it.
The wall was not going to be a problem, nor was the way to the main chamber. He had been here many times, but for legitimate reasons. This time was different. He still couldn’t believe what had happened that evening. Nobody in his position would have.
How could The Root be compromised! It was the inner core of The Delta. He silently cursed his luck as he slowly looked beyond the ditch that had been his hiding place for the past half hour. A flash of lightening illuminated TBRS Headquarters written on the granite board next to the eastern gate. Another damn cliché, I must stop watching those spy flicks he thought. A couple of guards who had been there for the last 15 minutes smoking were now moving away. This was it. He checked the battery charge on his equipment. It should last for a couple of hours. He removed a small remote with a touch screen and activated his suit that closely resembled a scuba divers suit. He started to slowly blend into the background until a point when only his eyes were decipherable when open. He started moving swiftly yet soundlessly towards the wall. He knew he was the only one who could pull this off. He had been trained for this after all!
Luckily, The TBRS never really had any sense alarms, which would go off if anyone spoke or touched anything important nor did it have any heat sensors or surveillance cameras. It was the headquarters for the Time Balance Regulation Services, TBRS in short. Surely nobody with the right mind ever planned on breaking into the TBRS. They were, in layman terms, called Time Police who regularly traveled through time to catch criminals. They were the best there was and known to be quite ruthless. If people traveled through time the world as we know changes. Their mere presence creates a parallel universe. But that was before TBRS came into the picture.

He quitely scaled the wall and landed softly on the other side. He had counted 5 officers scouting the perimeter and an officer stationed on the first floor and the terrace. They were all armed with automatics and night vision equipment. What use did it have when the enemy was a chameleon! He walked calmly towards the nearest door absolutely undetected, entered the access code and swiped a fake id in the slot next to the keypad. The door slid open. He thanked his paranoia for the hundredth time that evening.
He quickly moved through the atrium and entered a door almost hidden in the recess at the left corner. Nobody could have spotted the door unless they knew exactly where it was. The narrow passageway took him into the main chamber. There was nobody there. This was unusual, something was wrong. He knew there was no way in hell that this could be so simple yet right at the other end of the atrium was the safe box in which was what he sought.
The Cube.
Dr. Arielle Andréa and her team had developed the Time Cube to solve that problem. Now people could travel through time without disturbing anything as long as the traveler stuck to the certain rules. In fact she was the sole reason for Delta to even have a fighting chance. As he thought about the Cube his mind started to get clouded by the thoughts about Delta, The Root, his friends…. and Arielle. A bitter train of thoughts. There was no happiness in them. He has lost them all. In his reverie he almost destroyed the only hope left, if it wasn’t for a guard’s loud snore. For a moment his heart froze. He slowly surveyed the ceiling only to see that it was transparent like glass unlike during the day and also somehow even sound of the snoring guard sitting on a desk in the corner could also be heard. Immediately he realized that the ceiling was not transparent, in fact it was absent. The guard’s table was the only thing to be supported. This room amplified sound. The roof that was present by the day would absorb the sound waves making it a normal room. But without it even a pin drop would be like ringing a doorbell. The snore that he had been listening to all this while was just the guard breathing, he could now see him slowly scan the outside through a small window next to him. He turned on his anti-gravity shoes again thanking his paranoia for saving him from trouble. Though they were called antigravity shoes, they actually were variable polarity magnets that would align itself opposite to the earth’s magnetic field thereby using the repulsive force to slightly rise above the ground.
He moved to the other end of the chamber and slowly lifted the safe box from its place in a small compartment in the wall. He had to be very careful not to make any sound. The soft padding on his gloves helped muffle even the slightest of the sounds. The guard was still looking out of the window. Its time to get out of here he thought as he looked into his watch. 10:40. He quickly started to head back through the way he had come in.
Within no time he was over the wall and away from the headquarters. The guard had still not noticed the missing box. That was too easy he smiled uneasily, this must be where luck turned its tide he thought when suddenly the alarm went off. The guard must have realized that the box was missing. He cursed under his breath as started to sprint towards his transport, a mini jet.

It was only by 11 that he was with the box in his jet and at a safe distance from the headquarters. They had not picked up his trail. Putting the jet on autopilot he started to hack the code to open the safe box. Within 10 minutes he was through. Proclaimed the best, not for nothing eh, he mused. He now had less than 50 minutes to do whatever was left to do as per the plan. That would be more than sufficient. He still couldn’t believe it, how could this have happened to The Core? How did it come down to this? Well he had to put the plan into action. There was no turning back now. He was going to use the cube to go back in time. But this time he was not going to do it by the book. He was going to break the rule on purpose.

He was going to create a parallel universe....